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Lota Stories 15 July 2008

Posted by Ayesha Mattu in BARAKA, Culture, Humor.
13 comments
Image credit: www.urbanpeacock.com/images/

You know how sometimes you send out a link in an e-mail thinking it may interest your friends, and then receive an unexpected page-long response?

That happened recently when I sent out a link to an article in the race/culture journal ColorLines on the “shame and pride” of lotas and, by extension, our community’s traditional bathroom practices.

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Math 14 July 2008

Posted by MOZAFFAR in Humor, MOZAFFAR.
3 comments

There are three types of people in the world.

1- Those who know math.

2- The other guy.

Cheveux 3 June 2008

Posted by Ayesha Mattu in BARAKA, Culture, Humor.
12 comments
A rural Purelander lass

When you have an autoimmune disease that severely limits energy and movement, you have to plan each day carefully. If I bathe today will I also be able to stand long enough to cook? Can I manage 74 stairs roundtrip to check the mail? Do I have it in me to run that errand 4 blocks away (plus the stairs)? In San Francisco, I also have to factor in the constant hills and chart the flattest course possible. On some days, the flat line between the couch and the loo is about all I can manage.

Sometimes though, you just have to laugh in spite of it all. Like the whole Wax Factor. Lying in the hospital unable to do much beyond basic grooming is at first embarrassing and then just amusing. My eyebrows look like Brooke Shields circa the 1980s and seemingly have found a fine fertilizer in the on-going steroids course.

They are very, very…expressive.

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Delicious Desi Aunties 13 May 2008

Posted by Ayesha Mattu in BARAKA, Culture, Humor.
15 comments
Madhubala

I will never have a washboard-flat stomach no matter how many sit-ups I do. And these hips are here to stay.

I can’t help it, I’m Punjabi.

I recently saw a photo of fortysomething Demi Moore and a TV advert for some torturous exercise contraption featuring a 50-year old woman (or “grandmother” as they kept calling her). They both had bony bodies and tight faces as they strutted in their scanties. It made me droop with exhaustion thinking of the standards they represented as normal for the average woman and as desirable to the average man.

When is it going to be OK for a girl to become a woman who fills out and ages?

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Magic Khalas 29 April 2008

Posted by Ayesha Mattu in BARAKA, Humor.
10 comments

My youngest Khala (maternal aunt), who is only twelve years older than me, is visiting us right now. She used to read us scary stories late into the night in the haunted hujra (storage room) where we children sometimes trapped sparrows during the day just to feel their heartbeats hammering against our fingers before freeing them.

She’d turn her eyelids inside out till they gleamed red and weird marked with green veins because she loved to make us squeal.

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